Heat olive oil in a large pot. Sauté onion for 3 minutes until nosy and translucent.
Add garlic, carrots, and celery. Cook for 5 minutes until everything softens like your heart post-breakup.
Toss in chopped tomato, cumin, paprika, turmeric, salt, and pepper. Stir like you're stirring drama in a group chat.
Add lentils and broth. Bring to a simmer. Cover and let it cook for 25 minutes or until lentils are tender and thriving.
Stir in kale and cook for 5 more minutes. It’ll wilt down like your tolerance on a Monday.
Squeeze in lemon juice. Taste. Adjust seasoning if needed. Add more salt if you're feeling salty.
Serve warm in a bowl, ideally with crusty bread and zero responsibilities.
