Heat olive oil in a saucepan, sauté onion until translucent—don’t burn it while texting your ex.
Add garlic, stir for 30 seconds, then toss in mushrooms and thyme. Cook until mushrooms shrink like your tolerance for nonsense.
Sprinkle flour, stir well to coat—think of it like dusting your problems with carbs.
Slowly pour in broth while stirring. Let it simmer for 10 minutes as your kitchen starts smelling like competence.
Add almond milk, stir, simmer another 5 minutes.
Blend until smooth. Add salt, pepper, and nutritional yeast. Stir. Taste. Adjust. Judge.
Serve hot, preferably in a fancy mug while manifesting inner peace.
